


Llama Llama What?

by redscudery



Series: Scudery's Saturday Night Fic Fest [6]
Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Crack, It's For a Case, John is a Saint, Llamas, M/M, Scudery's Saturday Night Fic Fest, Sherlock is a Brat, there's a llama tag?, well he's wrong
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-14
Updated: 2013-12-14
Packaged: 2018-01-04 15:14:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1082533
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redscudery/pseuds/redscudery
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Doctahlock said in a comment "Man I can see John in a llama suit, I kinda like it. ;-)"</p><p>And there it is.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Llama Llama What?

“I’m sorry. Did you say ‘llama suit’, Sherlock?”

“Well, I didn’t exactly say it. I implied it. But yes, something like that.”

“Just to be clear, we are talking about a South American quadruped.”

“I believe so, yes.”

“Why, for all that is good and holy?”

“We have to blend in, John.”

“Where do we get it?”

“Well, I have my sources, but you’ll want to choose it yourself?”

“I think I probably would, yes?”

“I don’t know. My taste is impeccable.” 

“In llama suits?”

“Of course.”

“Of course. Don’t strain your modesty, Sherlock.”

“That eyeroll is the most unsubtle thing I’ve ever seen you do, John, which is quite impressive, considering your normal range of behaviour.”

“You are such an arse.”

“But I have good taste.”

John shook his head. The things he did for friendship? Love? Sherlock was actually standing there telling him that he needed to put on some sort of furry ..costume, and he, an adult male with a medical degree and a distinguished service record, was probably going to do it.  
______________

John was surprised at just how easy it was to obtain a llama suit. He thought he’d have to scour London for it, but the first costume rental shop he called had one, and when he went down to try it on, it fit. It didn’t even smell funny. 

Of course, it was still a llama suit. Nothing like being covered in fake fur and having a false behind with hooves on trailing behind to make a person feel conspicuous, especially on the Tube. However, John hadn’t really seen how he could carry the costume, and his face was only partly visible. He would have felt more comfortable with Sherlock beside him, but Sherlock had muttered something about “hair analysis” and “meet you there” and dashed off to Bart’s.

As he approached the conference centre, John paused. He could see that it was busy, but the people milling in and out weren’t dressed in anything remotely resembling the shag rug he had on. Rather, they were wearing suits. He looked down at his own fur and hooves and wondered what the hell Sherlock had been thinking.

Behind the statue, John. SH

As he made his way to the statue to the left of the entrance, John grinned. He could not wait to see what Sherlock had come up with. It hardly seemed possible that someone as vain as Sherlock would put on something so humiliating as a llama suit, but if it were, John wanted to be first in line to see it. 

John rounded the corner and saw Sherlock lounging against the statue’s base, long and elegant in a … suit? 

“Sherlock, what is this?”

Sherlock turned around. When he saw John, he did a near-perfect spit-take. John would have savoured having surprised him, but the fact that he was wearing a llama suit made the victory a little hollow. 

“John, I may have…” Sherlock paused. John didn’t really recognize the expression. “John, I may have made a slight error.”

“ERROR!” John was winding up to furious. 

“It appears that the fibre in question was alpaca rather than llama.”

“What does it bloody matter? Don’t they look nearly identical? Is the fact that I look like a giant prat not enough for you? I took the Tube in this getup, Sherlock!”

“John, I truly appreciate your dedication to the work. Truly. However, when I said ‘suit’, I did not mean…that kind of suit.”

“Forgive me for assuming that there is no other kind of llama suit, Sherlock.”

“You’re…” John could tell this was going to be good by the way Sherlock pursed his lips, “right. There isn’t. Alpaca, however, is another thing entirely.” He gestured to his own suit, which probably cost more than John’s entire wardrobe. 

“So I am wearing a humiliating costume because you were wrong, Sherlock?” John grinned, suddenly feeling much better. Oh, this was almost worth getting his fake llama arse trapped in the turnstiles.

“Essentially, yes.”

“So, would you say you owe me one?”

Sherlock shifted uncomfortably. 

“Sherlock?”

“I suppose.” 

John stepped right into Sherlock’s personal space. The llama face was now nose-to-nose with Sherlock. Sherlock looked a little grim.

“Let me tell you now, Sherlock Holmes, that you are going to pay and pay.”


End file.
